I want to shine on in the hearts of men

DO YOU KNOW WHO I LOVE MORE THAN ANYONE ELSE IN THE WHOLE WIDE WORLD?

DO YOU?

DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA???












MYSELF.
















Okay that's a lie, I love my education, career and NASA more than myself but whatever.

-BITCHES LEAVE-

I've had a Not Really Good few days which I pretty much don't want to talk about yet and then today as if to put the icing on the cake I get my hair cut off and the woman cutting my hair spends the whole time trying to hook me up with her son meanwhile I'm like lalala whatever la la la be nice she has scissors la la la -- and when I went to go check out I'm pretty sure she TOOK DOWN MY NAME AND PHONE NUMBER OFF MY CONTACT INFO IN THE SYSTEM and was like OH ARE YOU DATING SOMEONE ;D DO YOU HAVE FACEBOOK.

IT DOESN'T MATTER IF I'M DATING SOMEONE OR NOT. I DON'T WANT TO DATE YOUR SON.

WHAT THE FUCK.

SO... SO ANGRY.

Okay this was a chain email sent to me but I liked it so much I wanted to post it here. Seriously I think this man is my hero.


You all remember Sheriff Joe Arpaio of Arizona , who painted the jail cells pink and made the inmates wear pink prison garb, right? Well... SHERIFF JOE IS AT IT AGAIN!

Well, there's MUCH more to know about Sheriff Joe!

Maricopa County was spending approx. $18 million dollars a year on stray animals, like cats and dogs. Sheriff Joe offered to take the department over, and the County Supervisors said okay...

The animal shelters are now all staffed and operated by prisoners. They feed and care for the strays. Every animal in his care is taken out and walked twice daily. He now has prisoners who are experts in animal nutrition and behavior. They give great classes for anyone who'd like to adopt an animal. He has literally taken stray dogs off the street, given them to the care of prisoners, and had them place in dog shows.

The best part? His budget for the entire department is now under $3 million. Teresa and I adopted a Weimaraner from a Maricopa County shelter two years ago. He was neutered, and current on all shots, in great health, and even had a microchip inserted the day we got him. Cost us $78.

The prisoners get the benefit of about $0.28 an hour for working, but most would work for free, just to be out of their cells for the day. Most of his budget is for utilities, building maintenance, etc. He pays the prisoners out of the fees collected for adopted animals.

I have long wondered when the rest of the country would take a look at the way he runs the jail system, and copy some of his ideas. He has a huge farm, donated to the county years ago, where inmates can work, and they grow most of their own fresh vegetables and food, doing all the work and harvesting by hand.

He has a pretty good sized hog farm, which provides meat, and fertilizer. It fertilizes the Christmas tree nursery, where prisoners work, and you can buy a living Christmas tree for $6 - $8 for the Holidays, and plant it later. We have six trees in our yard from the Prison.

Yup, he was re-elected last year with 83% of the vote.

Now he's in trouble with the ACLU again. He painted all his buses and vehicles with a mural, that has a special hotline phone number painted on it, where you can call and report suspected illegal aliens. Immigrations and Customs Enforcement wasn't doing enough in his eyes, so he had 40 deputies trained specifically for enforcing immigration laws, started up his hotline, and bought 4 new buses just for hauling folks back to the border. He's kind of a 'Git-R Dun' kind of Sheriff.

TO THOSE OF YOU NOT FAMILIAR WITH JOE ARPAIO AT ALL HERE'S SOME MORE FUN FACTS:

Sheriff Joe Arpaio (In Arizona ), who created the 'Tent City Jail':
He has jail meals down to 40 cents a serving and charges the inmates for them.

He stopped smoking and porno magazines in the jails. Took away their weights. Cut off all but 'G' rated movies.

He started chain gangs so the inmates could do free work on county and city projects.

Then he started chain gangs for women so he wouldn't get sued for discrimination.

He took away cable TV until he found out there was a Federal Court Order that required cable TV for jails so he hooked up the cable TV again; only let in the Disney Channel and the Weather Channel.

When asked why the Weather Channel he replied, 'So they will know how hot it's gonna be while they are working on my Chain Gangs.'

He cut off coffee since it has zero nutritional value.

When the inmates complained, he told them 'This isn't the Ritz/Carlton......if you don't like it, don't come back!'


More On The Arizona Sheriff:

With temperatures being even hotter than usual in Phoenix (116 degrees just set a new record), the Associated Press reports:
About 2,000 inmates living in a barbed-wire-surrounded tent encampment at the Maricopa County Jail have been given permission to strip down to their government-issued pink boxer shorts.

On Wednesday, hundreds of men wearing boxers were either curled up on their bunk beds or chatted in the tents, which reached 138 degrees inside the week before.

Many were also swathed in wet, pink towels as sweat collected on their chests and dripped down to their PINK SOCKS.

'It feels like we are in a furnace', said James Zanzot, an inmate who has lived in the TENTS for 1 year. 'It's Inhumane.'

Joe Arpaio, the tough-guy sheriff who created the tent city and long ago started making his prisoners wear pink and eat bologna sandwiches, is not one bit sympathetic. He said Wednesday that he told all of the inmates: 'It's 120 degrees in Iraq and our soldiers are living in tents too, and they have to wear full battle gear, but they didn't commit any crimes, so shut your mouths!'

Way to go, Sheriff!

Maybe if all prisons were like this one there would be a lot less crime and/or repeat offenders. Criminals should be punished for their crimes - not live in luxury until it's time for their parole, only to go out and commit another crime so they can get back in to live on taxpayers money and enjoy things taxpayers can't afford to have for themselves.


HA. This man is EPIC.

Well that was not the start of the season I was looking for. Damn it UGA you just lost to OKLAHOMA STATE. I feel ashamed a little. How am I supposed to face my coworkers tomorrow? HOW.

There's always next weekend. YA'LL BETTER SHAPE YOUR SHIT UP. YOU HEAR ME UGA. YOU ARE ON THE LIST.

Aside from that ... HELL YES, NCAA FOOTBALL!!! I went ahead and signed up for an espn.com account to track the season. :3 ANYONE ELSE ON ESPN.COM? FRIENDS? Y/N?

Anyways I spent the day chilling on the couch drinking Wild Blue and watching football. It was relaxing to not have to go to the museum today. A good day off over all. After the game I went on a 6-7 mile bike ride in an epic fast time because when I got halfway out I noticed the storm front I'd thought was way off was in fact WAY CLOSE and ugh... I had to double time it back home. My legs are all kinds of sore because I haven't biked much at all lately. Mostly a lot of running. I try and get in 1.4 - 6 miles a night if I can. Lofty goals.

Anyways I wanted to talk about Wild Blue - the beer I had today - which is a blueberry lager and 8% alcohol by volume and BOSS. I say give it a try sometime. I usually dislike beer (unless it involves a ping pong ball or flipping keg cups) but this was nice. Probably because it doesn't even taste like beer it's like blueberry with an aftertaste of hops. Pretty decent.

AND I STILL HAVE FOUR BOTTLES LEFT!

I think that's about it for now. Work all day tomorrow.

Hope everyone is having a good Labor Day Weekend!

Updating from my flight pretty much just because I can. lol ... typing with one hand so I can sip coffee with the other. SO HOW IS EVERYONE ELSE DOING THIS FINE MORNING. LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL


WHAT AM I DOING?

IN FLIGHT INTERNET.

LIKE

A

BOSS.

FUCK YEAH

FUCK BITCHES.

GET MONEY.

I'M AWESOME HOT.

I NOT ONLY GOT PICKED FOR THE UPCOMING IN-STATE ACADEMIC CONFERENCE AS A PRESENTER...


....I ALSO GOT PICKED AS A PRESENTER FOR THE OUT-OF-STATE ACADEMIC CONFERENCE IN OCTOBER TOO. AND THAT ONE IS A MULTI-NATIONAL CONFERENCE. 0a8yhipoejf;dasfd omg omg omg omg



AW89E4YHPATIOJ;DSFALKSDHGAEWFIJOA;SDF

HOW AWESOME DO I FEEL!?

SO AWESOME.

THIS TIME TOMORROW.

AMBER AND I WILL HAVE BEEN TOGETHER FOR LIKE SEVEN WHOLE HOURS.

THE UNIVERSE MIGHT IMPLODE.

OMG I'M SO EXCITED.

YESSS YESSSSS

YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

I have a few posts waiting to go up but, this one seemed pertinent and funny so... LET'S POST IT INSTEAD.

I have like 309849384 pictures from my trip to Disney World but I want to actually edit those and make them look nice, these are more of a mish-mosh of random party shots which we all know never turn out right but hey that's the fun part.

So, without further ado.

7/11/09 - PARTY LIKE IT'S 1925

( THIS SEVEN LAYER DIP; IT'S LIKE AN ECOSYSTEM. UGGGH IT'S SO GOOD. IN MY MOUTH )

OKAY. Next entry.. probably gonna be the Disney one. We'll see.

-Kirk OUT

Here's a slice of life:

I go to work. All the time. If I am not at one job I am probably at the other job. Sometimes I work from home, sometimes (like today) I work from the Starbucks in Barnes and Noble. I do a lot of computer work. A lot of data entry. A lot of compiling of notes and information and I write some papers and I keep track of a lot of inane facts and sometimes they are useful.

If I am not at work I am most likely at home watching movies (usually The History Boys) or working on writing or reading.

If I am not at work or at home I am probably watching Star Trek (I've only been four times). It closes this week on the 2nd so I really don't know what I'll do once it's gone. I think this is one of the only movies I have been so jazzed about seeing on the big screen that I've gone to see it in theatres SO MANY TIMES. It just doesn't get boring. I know exactly what happens. I know whole scenes of dialogue from the film but it doesn't get old to me. I love it.

I love everything about it. Maybe this is just some warped extension of my love for space. I never really got into Star Wars like everyone else I know. It was good but it just didn't make me squeal in delight everytime it came on. In fact I remember very little from it but I dunno. Star Trek just gets me.

<:| Gene Roddenberry, I salute you. That's pretty much my whole life in a nutshell. I work, I sleep, I do something nerdy. End Story. It's not so bad really. It keeps me from seeing anyone in my family almost constantly. My dad went on some weird bender the other night about how my headaches are there for a reason and I have to make *~*changes*~* to make them go away. I don't know what mystical changes Dr. Retardo has in in mind over there but honestly I think if a neurologist can't come up with an answer then he's pretty well screwed in this battle. I think he just can't stand the fact that someone has a worse medical condition that he does and is totally at peace with it. I get headaches. Whatever. They suck in a profound way but it could be a lot worse. I take my meds, I get some tests every once in awhile and that's it. I move on. Sometimes they switch up my meds and I get loopy and excitable and that's even more cool. His were stress related. Mine are not since I get them at such random points. They've tracked this. There isn't a rhyme or reason to it. IT'S CHILL I GOT THIS, DAWG. Moving on I think I'll head home now - I think they'll be finished with dinner so I can go in and not speak to anyone. Holla! -Kirk OUT

Let me show you my current reading list:

1. Pedagogy of the Oppressed - Paulo Freire
2. Motorcycle Diaries - Che Guevara
3. How Did We Get the Bible?
4. Tractatus Logico-Philosophicus - Ludwig Wittgenstein
5. 50 Philosophy Ideas You Really Need to Know - Ben Dupre
6. The Ultimate Encyclopedia of Mythology
7. The Story of Philosophy - Will Durant

I just keep rotating them out but boy is it some kind of a brain-borking every time.

SAW STAR TREK FOR THE THIRD TIME. SQUEALED INCOHERENTLY.

Going again Friday. <:| don't judge me. -Kirk OUT

Ooops.

Uh lets see. My birthday is in one month and I think I'm going to go to Epcot Center. This was supposed to be my quarter century Party Like its 1925 Great Gatsby bash that I was really looking forward to because I love me some Great Gatsby but lets face it, it isn't going to happen. Sooooo Disney has that promo going where you get in free to any park on your birthday; but if you're a Florida resident then you can upgrade your one-free-day to a multi-day pass for dirt cheap. I think to go to a 3day pass is like $57 so I'll probably go the route of the 4-day pass and spend my actual birthday getting crunk alone in Epcot.

I will ride the Maelstrom as many times as I want to with NO INTERFERENCE from anyone what-so-ever. NONE. DISAPPEAR. DISAPPEAR!!!

That's exciting, I know. I'd really like to spend the night at a Disney resort just so I could have extra magic hours :/ we'll see.

Also, this really doesn't pertain to anyone on my friendslist but let's just be really clear here - I would enjoy just one year without someone getting shady as hell right near my birthday. I really don't know what it is but seriously, every year, someone just goes up off their rocker RIGHT around my birthday. As if me turning one year older suddenly signals the universe to inform a friend HEY YOU, BE A DICKWEED. Thanks. I'm glad that as usual someone has made this a reality. CONGRATULATIONS.

But going forward: Let's just quit, alright. Just. Quit. D<

On the work front, I'm presenting at an academic conference in September. I feel underwhelmed about it. But I'm hoping to use it as an excuse to buy a cute new dress and heels because I want to look fly while presenting. They'll be like damn, who is that smart, hot bitch up there? We need her at our University. STAT. PRONTO.

One can hope.

Mmkay time to shower and get out the door.

Also I had a migraine last night, it was the worst one I've had in a looong time. Treximet (you can look it up) took the edge off but still left me in so much pain I could only lay one way in my bed without moving. I finally gave up at 11 and took a really... strong... pain killer I had which helped knock me out enough to sleep most of the headache off. Still feel like my brain is wrapped in cellophane today but :/ oh well.

GOODBYE FOREVER.

-Julie

I have such a huge crush. I know it is useless and futile but I can't help myself.

( I know guys, I know. )

MAYBE IT'S JUST THE BRAIN INJURY TALKING, I DON'T KNOW. But I would hit that 'til candy came out.

-Kirk Out.

I loved the new Star Trek movie so much that even with a concussion I'D GO SEE IT AGAIN. Sure it made me lose my shit but that is FINE.

fffffffffff I love you new cast. I love you so hard it hurts. HURTS. I was squealing literally for the entire movie. Like I knew the whole plot because I basically watched EVERY POSSIBLE CLIP AVAILABLE ONLINE but seeing it on an IMAX DOME theatre screen was like a religious experience. I'm paying for it now but ugh so worth it.

UGHGHGHG I have such a hard on for Spock, Kirk and Bones. WHY ARE THEY ALL SO HOT. Man, Bones in this movie. Yes. Yes, son, yes. I mean, not hating DeForest Kelley because homegirl had it going on but ugugghghguhg new Bones ;_; be mine. He can send me to sickbay anytime he wants.

I went with my coworkers and we had a blast. haha ughghghgh going back to the doctor tomorrow.

-KIRK OUT.


OH ALSO -- UNSTARTREKRELATED but.

LOL I had.. a sex dream with RDJ ... as Sherlock Holmes. I was like what? OK! Not going to question this at all! VERY NICE. I LIKE.

Here, here, enjoy this that I found on the internet.

( all clothes are on but it might not be work safe for uh... implied content? )

I can has no car accident nao? :(

Poor Corky. That car takes a lickin' and keeps on tickin' - he's been insurance adjusted by the po-po insurance man and now I'm just waiting on the estimate and for the paperwork to get to me and then back to them. They've been really nice but it's like my stepmom said "well duh, they hit you they probably want to avoid as much trouble as possible." It's astounding to me that people would be so excited to try and take advantage of a situation like this. Yeah my bumper is messed up and yeah I have a concussion but it could be a lot worse and they're going to take care of it so.... do I really have room to complain or "sue the pants off them"? No. -_-; DON'T EVER BE THAT GHETTO, PEOPLE. EVER.

Anyways, the insurance adjuster was pretty cool. He came here to the house and brought his little camera and took lots of pictures and even got up under the car which of course my dumb ass hadn't thought about doing. He popped back out and said that the bumper would have to be replaced since the hinge for it on the side was broken and that underneath it had detached from the frame. I wasn't THAT surprised the foam absorber was shot but anyways what DID surprise me was that steel bumper bar was bent! D:

Well I guess he hit me harder than I thought and that would explain the concussion hahaaha.

Anyways here are the pictures I took this afternoon.

( File this under: things that suck )

It's really not that bad but if the bar is bent they have to replace the whole thing. :\ I called the Ford dealership today and they were so nice on the phone that I'll probably just go with them. After all they'll be able to get the parts fastest (they have the warehouse for the state HERE in Tampa), already have the paint available (my car has a specialty paint job - metallic undercoat and all), and they're a dealership that works with the police already so hoepfully it'll make everything pretty smooth. And they're close to 2 car rental places so I'll be able to get a rental car to come directly to me :3

SIGH SIGH SIGH.

It is a lot of red tape to go through but oh well life goes on. C'EST LA VIE.

wheee.

-Julie

I have been driving for TEN YEARS. In ten years I have NEVER been in a car accident. Never. Not a "oops ran over the mailbox and nobody saw me" not "oops you hit me but lets pretend it didn't happen" NO. NEVER. NOT EVER.

Today on my way to work....

( I GOT REAR ENDED )

-Julie

You would think that someone who loves to dress up, has an affection for princess dresses, tiaras and big hair styles would really enjoy the idea of wedding dresses.

I enjoy the idea of prom dresses, of costume dresses, of really any dress out there that comes with a huge fluffy layer of tulle on the underside and which involves prancing around and being ridiculous and fun and girly.

But I really do not like wedding dresses.

I went with a friend yesterday and she tried some on for fun and I watched and it was entertaining but it was nice being on this side of the camera. I didn't so much want to be on the other side. They're beautiful. All of them, with the beading and the satin and the lace and the applique and style and cut... I like to admire them like they're a piece of art but at the same time I don't really want to put one on.

I don't know why I have this unhealthy aversion to them. Every once in awhile I'll think that one looks nice and maybe it wouldn't be so bad to try it on but then if I was presented with the option I'd probably pass out.

Said friend insists that next day off she's going to stuff me into a dress come hell or high water. I have a feeling it will end a lot like how it did for Carrie on Sex and the City - where she puts it on and starts having a mental breakdown and gets a rash for days.

Hm.

-Julie

And I think it looks pretty snazzy - four pictures are ( Under the cut )

I look a little like Suri Cruise but I guess it can slide for now. Also in case you were wondering, no, I am not 14.

What is it with people and their sick sense of entitlement in this country? Like oh, because I am a customer, a consumer I have all rights, all authority. Let me shatter the illusion.



Just because you are the customer doesn't mean you have the right to break all reasonable laws and restrictions. The Customer is NOT always RIGHT and furthermore we all hate you. You leave, we talk about you. You say something nasty, we're mocking you. You treat us like sh!t? We remember and not only do we remember, we eff with you from that point on forevermore. You want your sh!t done a certain way? We will deliberately mess it up the next time just to make you wait, just to cause you a hassle, just to make you feel small and helpless and stupid.

Not because we are vengeful pricks but because you started it. Because we, for all intent and purposes are there to serve you within reason, but if you go outside that reason forget about it.

I hate the irresponsability of people. The fact that they think it is perfectly acceptable to act this way. It isn't! Look, I work part time at Publix, I don't even consider it my real job because I don't put any effort or real thought into it. I don't have anything invested in cashiering and bagging it just pays a couple of bills and gives me some extra cash to spend.

When your kid screams and throws things and breaks stuff in the store, it's your problem not ours. You gave birth to it, not me. Handicapped parking is for people that are GASP handicapped, not for people who are too lazy to walk ten extra feet to the store. The ride-on carts are for people who physically cannot walk through the store, elderly, injured whatever - if you are just fat, it's not for you - in fact, you're at a store, buying food to feed your fat - you need to walk, trust me. If it takes you an extra hour - good - that's an extra hour to think about what you shouldn't be putting in your cart. At Publix, we ask to take out your order because we know for a fact that you are a fat, lazy American and chances are you are just going to leave your cart in the lot for someone to run into (which I've seen someone speed through parking spaces and nail one and while I laughed so hard I cried, it's a pain in the ass to wheel them after that) or for us to have to go out and collect en masse later. In the Florida Sun, when it is 98 and sunny and humid and we are required to wear BLACK PANTS. Just let us take it out. I mean you would think that us, maximizing your laziness would entice but apparently it doesn't. IF you insist on taking your cart out yourself have the decency to put it back where you got it. I can't tell you how often I see someone, uninjured and capable, walk halfway to the store with the cart, ditch it in the handicapped space 20 feet from the door and walk back to their SUV.

You. Moron. It was 20 more feet.

Also, if there is a stop sign in a parking lot, chances are IT IS THERE FOR A REASON.

I, every time I collect carts, nearly get hit. Not once, not twice, usually once every 5-10 minutes, so around 6 times. Because people run stop signs, usually more than one; because people speed by the front of the store, because they race in between rows using the parking spaces.

Newsflash - people are out there. Workers, Customers, Small Children - but people are in a rush, because they think their lives are so much more important - that their life is so much more worthwhile and needing to be catered to. It isn't.

I had some psycho decide yesterday to run a stop sign, while I was pushing a baby cart, the car in front of her paused at the stop sign then turned, I walked out since ... there's a stop sign there for the crosswalk. She ran the stop sign and turned, and tried to hit me. At which point I jump over and scream THERE IS A STOP SIGN THERE YOU IDIOT. She rolls down her window and yells back at me "CUSTOMER HAS THE RIGHT OF WAY."

Excuse me? In what sick universe do you live in that your needs as a customer suddenly outweigh HUMAN. LIFE.

I just screamed NO. Because that's all there is to say to someone like that. Just "NO."

No, you are wrong.

No, you are a bad person.

No, you are a terrible human being.

No. No. No. No. No.

One day you will have to answer to someone else. Maybe God, maybe Buddha, maybe Allah, maybe Vishnu - but one day you will have to answer, and when you try to explain what it is that made your life so important that you had to run someone down with your car because you were in a hurry to get to a closer parking space because you were too lazy to walk ten extra feet, I don't think they're going to agree with you.

America, you're a little full of yourself. And it makes me sick.

Oh and as I side note to the jerks in my neighborhood - Armadillos move alarmingly fast, so for you to hit one, you had to be going alarmingly faster and not paying any attention. That poor animal was trying to get back to it's burrow and you murdered it. I hope you're ashamed of yourself.

I bought this:


AND I LOVE IT

I hope it hurries up and gets here :(

t.y. victoria's secret.